Le “Princess movie”

A while ago, I began to see posters for this movie called La Princesse de Montpensier. It looked kind of awesome, meeting some of my most important criteria for movies, namely:

  • Fancy costumes
  • With attractive men in them
  • And smoldering looks

    Doing minimal research, I discovered that the movie was actually about a period of French history I was studying at the time (la deuxième guerre de religion, if you must know). From what I could tell, it was about the Duc de Guise. Even though all I knew about said Duc was that he was assassinated in the Château de Blois, I was pretty sold on the film. For the next two weeks, I tried to convince anyone who possessed even a modicum of French-speaking ability that, yes, they really wanted to go see this princess movie with me. I even tried to sell going as a way to study for the final (no dice. Though given that I probably échoué’d anyway I might as well have gone).

    Needless to say, no one was interested. Until last night, when I finally found a companion as interested in Gaspard Ulliel as I was in historical angst. We went out to a slightly-more-ghetto-than-average theater in our arrondissement and prepared to be floored with historicity.

    In no particular order, here are my thoughts.

    • My French is either better or worse than I expected. Some vast swathes of dialogue were completely lost to me, but I kept up with the plot okay.
    • I completely forgot which side was the Catholic side and which was the Protestant side, despite having just learned about this in class, until about 2/3 of the way through the movie when someone brought it up.
    • I really wanted Philippe and Marie to be all cute and fall in love, but then she was all “ooh no I’m naïve and still in love with Henri even though he looks short” and Philippe was all “I am a jealous prick despite having a cute beta-wolf charm about me”
    • People are randomly naked in front of everyone like it’s no big deal. And the scene where Marie’s dad watches her get all perfumed up for her wifely deflowering was mo’ creepy.
    • François and Henri de Guise had two of the Frenchest noses I have ever seen on film, and this includes that of M. Depardieu.
    • The shots at Blois were really awkwardly aligned to avoid showing the part of the castle that was built in the eighteenth century, LOL.
    • Marie de Médicis kind of looks like Jabba the Hutt in this movie. Just sayin’.

    All in all, I’d give it a solid thumbs up. I’d say you can catch it at a theater near you, but you are probably American* and so you can’t.

    *Or Faux-nadian, but whatever.